How to Stop Arguments from Escalating in Your Relationships: 2 Strategies to Build Stronger Connection
Here are two quick strategies to stop arguments from escalating, improve your communication, and strengthen your relationship.
“The CPR Process of Repair” – is a 3-step roadmap to help couples recognize their cycles, step away from heightened emotions, and come together to process their feelings and resolve conflicts in a healthy and constructive way.
About the Authors
Tina and Michael LeBlanc have been happily married since 2003, are parents to two teenage boys, and have over 20 years of combined experience as Licensed Counselling Therapists. Being experts in the Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) model and using it to help couples in their work, Tina and Michael drew from the EFT model to create a list of 10 Habits of Happy Couples. In this series of articles, they take you on a comprehensive walk through the 10 Habits, and with each, they give you an overview followed by specific tips you and your partner can use in your daily life.
In any relationship, conflicts and arguments are inevitable. What matters is how we handle moments of tension and disagreement.
Our method, “The CPR Process of Repair” – is a 3-step roadmap to help couples recognize their cycles, step away from heightened emotions, and come together to process their feelings and resolve conflicts in a healthy and constructive way.
The CPR Process stands for Calm, Prepare, and Repair, and it has the potential to transform the way we approach conflicts with our partners.
Step 1: Calm
When emotions run high during an argument, we often lose access to rational thinking and find ourselves in a “Fight or Flight” mode. In this state, we may say or do things we later regret. The key to breaking free from this cycle is to find calmness within ourselves. Take deep breaths from the belly and activate the “Relaxation Response” to transition from fight or flight to a calm physiological state.
Engage in activities that promote relaxation, such as yoga or taking a short walk. Embrace positive affirmations or prayers to cultivate compassion for your partner and soften your emotions. The Calm stage allows both individuals to approach the repair process with a clearer and more understanding mindset.
Step 2: Prepare
After calming down, it’s essential to prepare for the repair process. This involves reflecting on seven crucial questions that lay the groundwork for a genuine and effective repair:
Taking the time to honestly answer these questions fosters a deeper understanding of oneself and one’s partner, setting the stage for a more constructive repair process.
Step 3: Repair
The Repair stage involves six essential steps designed to rebuild emotional connection and resolve conflicts effectively:
Remember, the CPR Process is a skill that improves with practice. The more you and your partner engage in this process, the better you’ll become at resolving conflicts and nurturing a deeper emotional connection. It is a journey towards creating a healthier, more fulfilling relationship, built on understanding, empathy, and genuine love.
Here are two quick strategies to stop arguments from escalating, improve your communication, and strengthen your relationship.
Micheal discusses his experience with having an avoidant attachment style, highlighting three common challenges and strategies to overcome them.
“The CPR Process of Repair” – is a 3-step roadmap to help couples recognize their cycles, step away from heightened emotions, and come together to process their feelings and resolve conflicts in a healthy and constructive way.
In today’s fast-paced world, it’s crucial to prioritize quality time with our significant others. This involves establishing rituals, engaging in meaningful conversations, and supporting each other’s well-being.
Having clear relationship rules and organizing your daily lives is a practical and crucial step towards a fulfilling and harmonious partnership. By acknowledging that life can get messy and unpredictable, you and your partner can work together to establish a system that caters to your needs and values.
It can be confusing to know if you should get help for your relationship, and then even more confusing to know who to get help, and what kind of of help you need! Read more to find out